Don't you hate it when they pretend you're naked in their magazine?

-->I've never recovered from the disappointment of not seeing him in his gotkes.














CNN is reporting that "film star Jessica Alba demanded that Playboy magazine pull its March issue, saying Thursday that its editors made her an unwitting cover girl and misled readers into thinking they could see her nude inside." She has sent a cease and desist letter available on The Smoking Gun.

Playboy responds, "Many celebrities have appeared on the cover of Playboy, but not nude, including Claudia Schiffer, Paris Hilton, Goldie Hawn, Raquel Welch, Barbra Streisand, Brooke Shields and Donald Trump."

I'm sorry, but that's just not enough. Don't you hate when you pick up an issue of your fave nudie mag, expecting to see a salacious picture of Donald Trump inside (possibly without the rat on his head???) and all you get is an advert for Trump Ice? Don't get me started on the time Larry King was featured.

Speaking on a personal level, I feel Jessica's pain, since I once was put on the cover of The Jewish Week, fully clothed but with the racy headline, "Maidel No Longer Aidel," and I got alot of flack from my old Yeshiva teachers, my parents' friends, various shopkeepers (that infernal dry cleaner!) and the homeless guy that strips on JewGrrl's train. They felt that had been laboring under a misapprehension and had expected that I would be featured in a compromising position (possibly wrestling with Country Yossi and the Shteeble-Hoppers?). Never mind that the article was about how I got stinking drunk at a Purim Seudah.

In that spirit, or apropos of nothing, Happy Adar! May this month bring you much happiness, naked or not.