Simchat Torah, Part Ew

Jumpin' Jewess here, your Simchat Torah correspondent for all news, all the time. Unfortunately, there is not much to say this year. Because of the holidays falling during the week, October was basically one long Shabbos (Sabbath to the secular readers in the audience).

Therefore, the entire month was spent:*
-eating
-drinking
-spending way too much time with family
-fasting/atoning
-then eating and drinking again and again (often in canvas huts)
-going to synagogue
-traipsing about in the rain
-dancing like a maniac in hora-like circles AND
-socializing (while simultaneously trying to avoid the freakish boys that used to like you and crunchy granola women swathing about in Grateful Dead-like tallises).
*Interspersed between all this gaiety were a few days spent at work, freaking out about how little could be done because of the impending holidays.

Now, I guess there's nothing wrong with one month of that in theory, but I, JJ, am personally sick of the whole dang shebang.

Which is why Simchat Torah was basically one long food/yak fest. Which is also why I am going into seclusion this Shabbos, where I will not be talking to anyone, celebrating anything at all (even the fact that Nick Lachey is probably a single man) or eating anything at all for a cleansing liquid fast. Okay, just kidding about the eating part. I am Jewish after all.